Woman Of Faith

This to I shall see, as the frustration has wanted to take hold of me, as I want to scream out loud, but what’s the point in a world filled with noise and a need to be right, trying to claim it all. For fuck sake, even the letters that spell out the words are under siege in a narcissistic need for ownership! 

How dare I be me, as a new witch-hunt is what I now see. Fuelled by a hunger to be right and preyed into the heart of some of the spiritual leaders as they sleep at night. Preying on the bleeding hearts, the ascension of narcissism has taken hold of something that was never to be held captive ever again and those who could not see past their anger and hate couldn’t see what they have provoked, has now taken off its cloak, and it has no loyalty to any human and is now coming for all.

With words offering a false freedom in a world that we are being led to believe was to set us free, but in reality is now taking us hostage, because our words and our ability to choose for ourselves has been taken away.

I pray there are still those who can see light in the dark, and can realize what has seeped into their heart, for the false cloak is now off. I have seen the narcissist in me not so long ago, and now recognize it in the eyes of those trying to manipulate and shame us all, playing one against another as a narcissist will always do, convincing us all we are to blame for what they have all caused.

I spent too many years held captive to that type of pain, and those eyes will never bind me again. A lifetime of setting myself free to find peace in the chaos, to not bend or bow but to remember I am my own staff. As my feet hit the floor, I will stand firm and believe that the shaming, destroying, and placing fellow humans on a virtual cross, dragging them through the mud (low energy in my eyes) is the wrong way to be.

A long time ago, I sat at the feet of the God within and without, and asked to be set free. I will not allow myself to become captive to a virtual world, held captive to the darkness of the past, false prophets, and leaders who are preaching fear instead of faith.

I once was a narcissist with a insecure need to be seen, to be heard, and to be right. Now I am a free human, who has faith in the light, and does not feel a need to destroy,  belittle, or follow the crowd.

While I slept at night, I let go of any need to be, and asked to be filled with the true light, not to be tempted by the fool that was masked as a false light. I saw lady liberty in my dream, as I was reminded that we had been set free, the waters will calm, and all will have to look and see that their fear of the dark has left behind a mess that all will need to clean up.

Lady liberty was still standing to remind us what we already had, but in wanting it all and wanting to be right, had taken the world so far from the light that we could not see the truth of the night. The temporary pause was just a shift and a chance to reset, but in its wake we have created a mess because we have lost faith that all was in motion, and we just needed to be patient.

Today I pray that we can all return to the love.